St Patricks Day T-Shirts
March 9, 2010
Saint Patrick’s Day is coming up (March 17) so here’s the 7 best Irish / St Patricks day themed t-shirts we could find!
1. Fuck You You’re Irish T-Shirt $19.00
2. Irish I Were Drunk T-Shirt $16.99
3. Fight Me I’m Irish T-Shirt $16.99
4. Irish Today Hungover Tomorrow T-Shirt $29.50
5. I’ll Drink You Bitches Under the Table T-Shirt $29.60
6. St. Patrick’s Day Drinking Team T-Shirt $23.35
7. The Green Mile T-Shirt $27.95
Seen any better St. Patrick’s Day T-Shirts? Let us know in the comments below!
God Kills a LOLcat T-Shirt
March 3, 2010
Those damned LOLcats. “Can has cheezburger? I r in ur rectim sleeping.” They’re as cute as they are horrible at grammar. Speaking of which, God has decided He’s had enough with the lackadaisical English usage. According to the God Kills a LOLcat t-shirt, every time a cat “can has” something, a LOLcat loses one of its nine lives. Conversely, every time a bell rings, a LOLcat gets its head stuck in the stairs banister.
You can tell the cats are dead on this shirt because there’s a bloody stack of about seven of the little twerps with little Xs for eyes, a telltale sign that someone/something is dead. Underneath them is the caveat, with “God kills a LOLcat” in bold red font, just in case you thought He was joking about this shit.
There may be a war raging in the Middle East and 400-billion unemployed people in America, but it’s good to see God devoting some of his precious omnipotent time making sure the world’s LOLcat population starts using better grammar. These insane captions need to be put down. There is no Z in cheeseburger! There is no spoon! (?)
Details:
Color: Black
Sizes: S-3XL
Price: from $15.99
If you ask for a cheeseburger correctly, you are more than welcome, LOLcat.
Get your God Kills a LOLcat t-shirt here.
Weekend Forecast T-Shirt
February 26, 2010
You may want to plan that zoo trip and family picnic for Sunday, as it looks like there’s an 80% chance of afternoon alien invasion Saturday, according to the Weekend Forecast t-shirt. Headline Shirts’ exclusive Storm Tracker Triple 4-D Super Doppler Radar is picking up a hostile UFO front moving southeast out of Canada. The system will likely include short, macrocephalic green men with bulging eyes, hovering spacecrafts and light flurries.
In this irreverently sardonic tee, a typical three-day forecast includes a 71-degree planetary takeover sandwiched between two wonderfully temperate spring days. Overall, a pretty lovely weekend.
Of course, that alien invasion could miss us entirely, making it a great weekend. Mother Nature is fickle when it comes to when and where she decides to dump her rain, sleet and/or galactic antagonists.
Let’s resolve to prepare for the worst — sharpen your pitchforks, hide your daughters — but hope that this particular alien invasion hits Columbus, Ohio. Unless you live in Columbus. In which case, you might want to start contemplating by what random yet essentially simple means (water, ultraviolet light, the love of a child) you may defeat the alien race.
Details:
Colors: Black
Sizes: S-XL
Price: $19
You don’t want to get unwittingly caught in an alien invasion storm.
Check the forecast, get your Weekend Forecast t-shirt here.
I’m In Ur Blank T-Shirt
February 24, 2010
“I’m in ur computer reviewing ur t-shirts.” That’s what my I’m In Ur Blank t-shirt would say. Confused? I’ll explain. This nifty write-on, wipe-off t-shirt comes with a washable marker, some blank lines and the essence of a Web-famous catchphrase — I’m in ur base killing your d00dz.
If you’re unfamiliar with this line, bless your heart, but just know that it originated among on-line gamers and was then inexplicably picked up by the LOLcats (or is it LOLcatz? I don’t fuckin’ know) movement. Anyway, it’s time to see this Internet classic with a clean pair of eyes, and the onus is on you.
It’s like Madlibs, except all you ever need is a location, a gerund and a noun. If you’re a doctor you could be “in ur colon videotaping ur ass.” The state penitentiary’s alpha male may be “in ur colon dicking ur ass.” Prostate cancer would be “in ur colon cancering ur ass.” As you can see, the possibilities are endless. If you don’t like where you are and what you’re ____ing, just wash the shirt and come up with something new. It doesn’t even have to be colon or ass related.
Details:
Color: Black
Sizes: S-3XL
Price: from $17.99
Comes with a washable marker so you can write and reuse!
I’m in ur good esteem insisting ur wise enough to get the I’m In Ur Blank t-shirt.
Rock Papers Scissor T-Shirt
February 18, 2010
The game Rock, Paper, Scissor is just stimulating enough to help keep some shred of sanity during long road trips or while waiting in line with your kids to see Caillou on Ice. It’s with much appreciation, then, to see that the clever chaps over at Headline Shirts have reimagined the game in their Rock, Papers, Scissor t-shirt.
Here’s the breakdown for the new millennial version of the old classic: Rock = Crack Cocaine; Paper = Rolling Papers; Scissor = Switchblade.
It’s all easily spelled out on the shirt with big, bold pictures and rough, bulky font. How do you play? Good question. One imagines that playing any sort of “game”, though, isn’t the point with accoutrements like these. After all, who would smash $400 of sweet rock on top of someone’s knife? And shouldn’t a pipe – not rolling papers – beat crack? Who freebases with rolling papers?
Look, the point is just to do drugs, kids, or at least joke ironically about doing drugs.
Details:
Colors: Slate
Sizes: Men’s Small-2XL; Women’s Small-XL
Price: from $19
I once participated in an attempt to break the Guinness World Record for biggest Rock, Paper, Scissor game. We failed. I have to think it’d at least have been more interesting had everyone played by Headline Shirts’ Rock, Papers, Scissors shirt rules. Get yours here.
